How do I follow the previous blog? I meant to add loads of other blogs about the tour but nothing I could think to say seemed important enough to write about. Its all a little one dimensional. That's how I'm feeling - one dimensional. I could write some witty quip about nothing important, or I could babble on about god or music in an attempt to make people think I have intellect, as a cover up for something deeper. But it all sounds the same to me right now. It's all pretend, all a bit like I'm designing peoples perception of me. I had hoped this blog would be a chance for me to show my colours but to be honest I'm pretty shocked by how shallow it all reads, and all the tricks and repetitive surreal comedy I throw around to cover up something more? or maybe this is it. Maybe it is a true reflection of myself, one I had hoped not to see. baa who cares.
I'm not down. Really, I just feel switched off, on standby, kinda numb. I ought to mention what happened after Asia.
Played Japan which was amazing, watched Prodigy 4 times and loved every minute. Returned to the UK, had a great time in Edinburgh, met some very nice people after the show. V festivals were a little turbulent, Birmingham show was the best. And Paris show was a pile of dog shit. Although Paris as a place was as bourgeois and rad as ever. It rained in Wales (duh) and now I'm back in LA.
BOLLOCKS. I should be maybe keeping some mystique about me and the band right? I shouldn't be writing here as though its some kind of teenage diary. But then whats the point of it at all. It would be all lies and mirrors. like tattoos on the skin telling stories of what i want people to believe, but only skin deep. Others keep their private thoughts, lives detached from this, cover it up with deflecting jokes or adopted rants, create a persona weekly like a copy of kerrang, in order to sell to as many people as possible. Trivial.
I write here the way I do because my Dad reads it. When I was a painter, living in Wales I'd call my Dad about anything and everything...all the time, "what colour should I do the sky? what does this part mean, who am i bla bla bla." Always me doing the talking and him listening. I left all that and joined the band. Best thing in the World for me, never thought much about what a void I must have left in my Dad's days. I use this blog as a chance to talk to my Dad again about all the stuff not important enough to talk about on the phone or in the short times I am home. Or maybe too important, so important I don't have the balls to say out loud.
So, if anyone is thinking I give away too much, F**k you, just don't read it! (not you dad, and sorry for the bad language) If anyone thinks I'm abusing my privilege and being irresponsible and giving the band a bad rep, delete me! If anyone thinks I should put all this in an email instead of a public blog and stop being so f**king narcissistic, get in line behind me. I never said I knew what I was doing. I never promised I would give anything of value. I didn't send out any invites. Take it or Leave it.

p.s. Most of this was aimed at myself. It must be fairly clear that I'm struggling with who I am supposed/allowed to be here. I'm obviously trying to convince myself and justify what I write and say. All I ask is please leave your expectations and judgments at the door on your way in. Diolch yn fawr.

"It's my party and I'll cry if I want to
Cry if I want to, cry if I want to" - The 'Stewart & Gaskin' version 1981

Apparently one of the songs to be featured on the New Guitar Hero game, will be Rooftops. This is according to wikipedia, and referenced by the September issue of the Official Xbox magazine. Any more info we will let you all know asap

xxx

Thanks to various people from megalolz for finding these video’s

V festival 2008 performance
NME interview Ian
Jamie and Lee interview
Signing Tent/Jamie and Lee
New song “These streets of nowhere”

enjoy xxx

The boys have been playing lots of gigs lately, and we have lots of fab photo’s up in our brand new gallery that we have been busy working on

click here for op4am gallery

The gallery has over 4,000 pictures, scans etc for you to enjoy.

Black Velvet magazine has some fantastic pictures from last nights gig that you can see by clicking the link below, so be sure to check these beauties out

Black Velvet Magazine

xxx

Thanks to all for supporting us at V Festival in Chelmsford and Stafford this weekend.We'd like apologise for the absence of guitarist Lee Gaze for the majority of the set on Sunday at Stafford. He wa...

For all those who are gonna come hang out, just wanted to let you know that its OVER 21's. Sucks i know, but that's how silly the law can be. There's also a dress code of sorts, nothing specific but y...

Yep, thats right. I'll be spinning crazy tunes this friday eve at Sideshow @ Circus. As a pre V fest wrist warm up.Address is the Soho Revue Bar,Walkers court, off Brewer StreetSoho, London It all kic...

You can now download an op4am.com toolbar which will work in FireFox and internet explorer for free from the link below. Our toolbar has built in RSS feeds that will tell you when the boys update any of their blogs, or if we update our myspace.

CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD THE OP4AM TOOLBAR

Wow, where do I start? I guess I apologise for not doing a day to day blog firstly. Its been a little difficult to get online, and when I have, I've opted to go and see the place I am at instead (selfish I know).

Well, the 17 hour flight from LA to Jakarta was a breeze. Singapore Airlines were amazing, economy was like first class, so much leg room, puts all other airlines to shame! I slept loads and played FF7 Crisis core all the rest of the flight with mikey. They even had metal knives and forks! luxury. We had a short connection flight when we arrived and then onto the hotel.

The first thing I noticed on the drive from the airport was how poor some of the country was. It seemed like a massive divide between the very wealthy and the very poor. There were iron and cardboard shacks all along the waters edge for miles, plastic bottles and rubbish littered the rivers. There was a constant smell of decay and sewage in the air. Then suddenly as though we crossed an invisible line into the city the high rise buildings and posh hotels replaced the slums. It was very humid. We asked to be taken to see some sights, and the host drove us to a mall with western stores, we were like "nah mate, can we go see the real Jakarta?" so they drove us to this street and we got out. We walked down this ally, and the security guy with us said to be very careful because it was dangerous. I've never seen anything like it. I was shitting myself. I suddenly felt very embarrassed, I was hoping to take pictures but felt as though I was taking advantage of the people for my own gain. Most people were friendly but you could sense that some couldn't believe that we were there, walking around. I couldn't work out who was looking at/watching who. We kept moving and stuck tightly together for safety, I'm sure if we were in a smaller group we would have found trouble. Thank god for the security dude with us. For the most part I took photographs off the hip so to keep my camera out of sight and also not to offend anyone. I was nearly brought to tears by some of the children walking and laying around. We were not harassed by people begging because I think people we more surprised to see us in the area, but it was a very, very humbling experience. Even amongst such poverty I could see people smiling and laughing, and the colours were amazing. After we returned to the hotel, I had a hard time readjusting and justifying sleeping in 5 star luxury having just witnessed what I did. I was awash with emotions and guilt and a very strong sense of iniquity. The contrasts I saw and photographed were extreme. I am still confused between pity, sympathy, gratitude, guilt and helplessness and feel I have been changed. I have felt quite mildly depressed since.

The show was amazing, but somehow my mind was not 100% focused and continually returned to the young child without shoes following us around that day. Such tragic beauty.

We left for Singapore, everything since has been a blur. I've been poorly with stomach cramps and find it difficult to get my energy back. Singapore could not have been more opposite to Jakarta. It was very clean and very rich. The hotel was like nothing I had ever seen. I thought they had made a mistake when I entered my room because there was no bed, but I had no idea that it had its own bedroom and 2nd bathroom. The suite was bigger than my home. As amazing as Singapore was, my first impression left feeling cold and dead. I went for an explore to the rain forest at Bukit timah and found some peace and harmony at the top of the hill, and decided to take a random bus to where ever and walk around the city. I walked for 5 or 6 hours not in a hurry to arrive anywhere. It was very welcome solitude where I was able to tidy up the mess in my head from the past few days. My stomach still hurts and is making my dizzy and disorientated because I can't eat much without spewing.

I would like to add, I have some amazing friends around me and have met some great people. I really do appreciate how lucky I am to do this journey and to share this with very like minded friends. I know your thinking, "what about the shows?" but to be honest, the experience is so much more than simply performing. The Singapore show was fraught with technical problems but in the grand scheme of things it doesn't matter. Everyone seemed to enjoy themselves and I wouldn't want to disrespect those people who came to see us by allowing technical issues to dominate my memory of being and performing there. It is a privilege to be here and do this so I must take the mistakes, learn from them and apply.

As you can probably see, I'm all a little up and down. I am pretty overwhelmed and I am trying to be positive even though some of my experiences have changed me. Today's show in Hong Kong looks like it will be awesome. I am going to rest up so I can play my best. I don't think I have enough time to fully experience Hong Kong on this journey, maybe one day I'll be lucky enough to come back.

I'll be posting my photos up on my flickr when I have enough time, gotta go sound check now.

....and justice for all

Bye bye!
Stay tuned for tour blog, if I can get onto a computer. fun fun fun.